It’s hard to fathom (pun intended) that as a child I was terrified of the water.  But it’s actually not that surprising. I had terrible eyesight and at the tender age of 3, I started wearing glasses. 

My parents had a small cabin cruiser boat that was docked at a marina in Quincy and we used to take it out in the harbor on weekends. I was terrified. They went too fast, they drank too much and I always held on for dear life from the moment I got on the boat until I got off. I never went in the water. It was over my head and I could not see. In a moment of sheer madness, my great uncle John decided one afternoon that the best idea was to pick me up and throw me over into the water. That would teach me not to be afraid…

Well that didn’t really work out for many years. When I got to be a teenager, I was not afraid of the water but I wasn’t very good at putting my head in the water and blowing out my nose. I eventually learned. 

Here we are now and for me, water is life. When I swim, I am not the person who gradually enters the water and acclimates. I am the walk right in and plunge head first kind of gal. It does not matter if it’s a pool, a pond or lake or the ocean. I’m in. Over the years, I have always felt that I needed to get my head in the water to, as I put it, “cool my brain”. This comes from years of a very stressful career in public safety. 

So what does any of this have to do with my recent hospital adventure? Well I will tell you! I was told on a particular Saturday that I would be going home. I was so excited to get out of there and get back to my home and family. That morning, Gage the Nurse Practitioner came in and delivered the bad news. I was not going home. My troponin levels had gone up after days of a steady decline. A new medication was in the plan and I could not go. I was devastated. Truly. 

So Gage and I had a discussion and I told him I wanted to take a shower. I wanted to be left alone and not have someone knocking at the door every 5 minutes to ask if I was okay. I wanted to sit on the shower chair and just let the water run over me for as long as I wanted. And I did. I don’t remember how long I sat there but it was for awhile. After I got done and dressed (clean johnny!) I was back in my recliner for the day. I had a brief text exchange with my niece about this experience and she pointed out what was really going on…smart woman that she is!

This was my way in that moment of washing away all that had happened to me. Of cooling my brain from the stress and worry of the situation. Of bringing me back to the water where I find the most comfort and joy. Of giving me the strength and resolve to carry on. A week or so ago I was thinking about this and another light dawned on me…something so obvious but that I had never even thought of. 

I am Aquarius. The Water Bearer. 

So now we ask what does Water for Elephants have to do with this? Nothing much really. Elephants will travel long distances for water and never forget where it is. I would to. But truthfully, there was a really good book that came out several years ago that was the smash summer read that season. It was called…

Read it.